full stop

i keep seeing posters of this upcoming movie on the subway, and for some reason it keeps catching my eye. oh yes, Reese Witherspoon won't be at the premiere; she'll be busy swapping spit with Jake Gyllen-ho. speaking of whom, did he say anything when Heath Ledger kicked the bucket?


Stop-Loss is a drama about a soldier (Ryan Phillippe) who's about to be sent to his second tour of duty in Iraq. yelling, chest-thumping and crying ensue.

i'm not here to promote the film; am just here to be a smartass. looking at the poster - what were they thinking?

Abbie Cornish (Michelle)

"holy shit! i'm in a movie with my cool boyfriend Ryan Phillippe! hope i don't see Reese at the premiere!"

here's how sick this gets: Abbie Cornish -> swapped spit with Heath Ledger -> swapped spit with Jake Gyllenhaal -> swapped spit with Reese Witherspoon -> swapped spit with Ryan Phillippe -> swapped spit with Abbie Cornish

how's that for six degrees, eh? Kevin Bacon is ROTFL.


Channing Tatum (Steve)

"what the hell am i doing here? i want to go on the new Ricky Martin tour, dammit!"

Ryan Phillippe (Sgt. Brandon King)

"how i got to be a sergeant, i don't know. as long as i look cool. i'm the coolest of them all. you can tell by the way i pout."


Joseph Gordon-Levitt (Tommy)

"if you don't still get it that am the greatest actor of my generation (that's Gen 3rd Rock From The Sun), you need to get out more. did you see Brick? did you notice my fine acting chops? am not a sell-out. Heath Ledger just beat me to the punch! i can do death!"

"oh, by the way, see you in 2009 ... i'm playing Cobra Commander. eat that, losers."