The Slow Death of Philippine Cinema As We Know It

this one's is from yesterday's Inquirer.

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HELLO po! To all you readers po and televiewers po out there, Kuya Germs, Kuya Boy, plug lang me my latest movie po, "Bikini Open" po! Thank you po, fans. I labshu!

Hi to Robbie Tan, the producer! Hi to Ate Jimboy (not his real name) for my stylist! Hi to Direk of course. And last but least, my Seiko family! Kamusta kayo diyan, mga friends! Always remember po, "When it's Seiko, it must be bold! Po!"

Back to the movie, I'm very pleased with it po. Direk Jeffrey says my performance is good po ("Iho, nincompoop ka!"). And proud po me of this labor of love po. It's hard rin po to be hours in your bikini at 5 o'clock at night po and it's so hard to be relaxed po when there's a lot of Manongs and Manangs in the set po. They keep looking at my tralala po.

In truth po, I was quite hesistant po in accepting the role. Pero, I read the script of Kuya Chris Martinez and it was hilarious, you know? Plus may meaning po. There are issues po that Kuya Chris talks about like... bikini po ...and open po. But let me tell you about the movie muna po.

All of the labors was worth it po because the film po is quality naman po. It's about a Bikini Open po. There's a reporter, si Ate Cherry Pie, na sobrang sweet as in matamis talaga in person. Ate Cherry po in the movie has a show po and tries to get ratings po by making hubad the lives of the other characters po.

Then there's the models like Ate Diana, Ate Francine and Kuya Rafael who undergone po the rigors and trials and corruption and graft of Bikini Opens po.

Direk said it's a "mockumentary" po (Tama ba, Direk?). I do not know po what it means po but it's a common sense daw. So stop asking me po what it means.

You can see me po in this movie of mine starting May 18 in an SM near you po. If you look closely po at the pictures above, below and beyond, you will find me po. Kitakits po!

Sa mga producers, ready na po me for my next film!

Caring and sharing,

Dao Ming Zoo